problems

I am honestly freaking out about this art show. I feel like that one muppet piano player guy, who is basically terrible at playing the piano, but is so full of artistic angst that he's banging his head on the keyboard and wailing loudly.

I am not happy with the work I've done, I think it's all wrong and not what I wanted to make and nobody is going to like it. I'm freaking out about money, and feeling pressure to make stuff that is sellable, and that doesn't help at all with creativity.

I wanted to make things that are beautiful and good.

I feel paralyzed by all of the internal pressures and I don't know how to get out of it.

a few things for you

Gutenberg project has free audiobooks (go for the human read ones though). The kids and I are currently enjoying the Sherlock Holmes stories.

This is a really great little flash game. Scott figured out the solution because he is so smart.

Free wiki.

A neat tool for cataloging your home library.

Mailinator, for making free disposable email addresses.

I guess that's it for now.

first the walnut, now this

I stepped on a bee.

I was painting, and bees are attracted by the scent, they fly in and out of the window while I'm painting. I had just finished drawing a line, and I put my foot down on the floor, and OWWWW!!! I stepped on a fricking bee. So here I am now, lying on the bed with ice on my foot when I should be painting. Also I need to get groceries for the kids.

Sigh.

creeping closer

Martina wants me to hang at least part of the show before Oct. 5, because the Boho awards thing is happening a few doors down from her store. I still am feeling really diappointed and kinda blah about what I've made for the show. I hope that I am able to shake that off and just make some nice stuff and have fun. My birthday is coming up on October 4th. I suppose I'm just going to ignore it and keep on working.

I've gotta make my small blocks. So far I've done 2, and I'd like to have 50.

Artmaking tips from the Scarlet Letters via 43 Folders

it's fall!

Today the kids and I were out on a walk and a walnut fell from a tree and hit me right on the head!

And here's a painting.

bunny!

Do I need this? Probably not, but it's so cool! A wi-fi bunny that lights up and does stuff when you get an email and junk. (via boingboing

"pet" to blog day

This is Jack. He is a cat that lives in my house. I hesitate to call him a pet because if you try to pet him, he will bite you. He is a mean and kind of crazy cat, but he's pretty. We adopted him from the shelter as a birthday present for my daughter when she was turning three. We chose him above all the others, because he had a note on his cage about how we was the best cat in the world, so loving and sweet and the owner was devastated about having to give him up. Either that woman was lying through her teeth, or he was in some other cat's cage!

When we got him home, the children were terrified of him. He would hide under furniture and randomly jump out and bite people. He would let them pet him a few times and then bite them. He's pretty terrible. Z keeps insisting that he's getting nicer, and sometimes that's true. We have learned only to ever pet him when he comes into bed in the morning and butts against our hands, and then only ever on the face, because that's how he likes it.

from the Heidi n'Will show

deer boats

The deer boats are journeying through a cold colourless world. They'll be okay though, I think.

In other news:
I don't feel good
The painting I made for Crafters United has a new home
I designed three t-shirts, which will be coming out in limited editions in early October

i am big

okay

It went better today. I came up with a few things that I don't hate, and my giant box of postcards came!! I have a whole ton of them. If anybody would like to have one, please drop me an email and I'll send one right out! monstertown at sbcglobal.net.

feeling stuck

I am gearing up for another full day of painting, which I am hoping will be better than yesterday! Yesterday was a sad sad day for painting.

I think I'm really feeling the pressure of this upcoming deadline, and I just really want to make a good show, full of good pieces. I called the show, "What Comes Next" because I want to make pieces that draw people into a little fragment of a story. I want to make characters and scenes that are engaging and that make people curious and interested. Sadly, I'm not having any story bits come to me.

Maybe I should just paint abstracts. Maybe color field paintings. The encaustics are so pretty just by themselves!

Here are some paintings that I'm not sure of.

oh, i forgot

this one's my favorite

some new paintings

I've been working like a mad weasel...no time to blog...here's some of what I'm doing

good

The meeting with the screen printer went very very well. He is flexible, and he liked my work, and he thinks that he can get it done in time for the shows.

He explained the color separations to me, and showed me a very cool set of transparencies by Joe Leonard that he is printing up for an upcoming show.

This is very good.

Also I got the files for my postcards sent to the printers. Here's what the back looks like. (thank you Scott!)

omg don't panic

Martina wants me to have my opening one week sooner than we had talked about before. So everything is pushed forward. I am trying not to freak out. I mean it's only one week less, right?

She does have a bit less wall space now, so that's good, and I have already completed several paintings.

I want to make this show really beautiful and interesting to people. I want to tell little bits of stories. I have lots of ideas for little series' of paintings. I also need to stop looking at artists' websites. I get this weird kind of sadness looking at all of the beautiful work, and I think that it could be pointless for me to pursue artmaking.

Anyway, here is my to do list, as I see it right now:

GOALS FOR SHOW:
50 small block paintings
3 large multicolor screenprints
8 medium encaustic paintings
6 large encaustic paintings
new series of 5 small gocco prints

TO BE DONE RIGHT AWAY
get postcard design to printers
get t-shirt designs to Martina (we're making 3 limited edition t-shirts for the show)
talk to screenprinter about having large prints made
mailing list
press release?

Okay, computer off for the day (except for business!)

a little treat

printmaker Ayu Tomikawa
Thesis
nice art blog (try not to be put off by the name)

painting up

My painting for Crafter's United is now up on their shop.

Together the indie craft/art/design community has raised over $16,000 so far thanks to the efforts of the people at craftrevolution.com and the generous donations of people who make things.

I love the internet.

read this please

This is an insightful essay by Rebecca Solnit for Harper's Magazine. I think that you should read it.

Will and Heidi's Show

My friends Will and Heidi are having a big show at Roshambo Winery. The opening is this Saturday. Details are here. This is also Spring's curatorial debut, sorta. She's curated shows before, but this is her first one as the official curator for Roshambo. I can't wait to see Heidi's knitted creatures. I'll post photos here after the show.

vacation report

Details of our vacation are posted over at Scott's blog! I've been meaning to do this too, so I'm happy that he did.

look

Check out the Katrina relief t-shirt from Threadless, buy it for only $10, and they'll donate $20.

(found via port2port)

european shoes

I found 13 pairs of beautiful brand new very expensive shoes this week! Very exciting. I have them up on ebay.

don't talk

I've been feeling really sad and angry about the hurricane and it's aftermath. I can easily get worked up into an overwhelming feeling of impotent outrage. I haven't been writing here because I haven't yet detangled my thoughts. I already detest this administration, and this makes it even worse.

Besides that I've been thinking about poverty and survival and preparedness and planning. I'm done with being poor. It's really not at all fun, and not what I want for my kids. I mean, I'm not dirt poor. I pay my rent every month, and we're not hungry, and I have a car and a computer and the internet. But every month I'm wiped out, we have no health insurance, no savings, and nothing extra, and it makes me feel way too fragile.

I'm working harder, doing more eBay listings, making more paintings. I'm going to try to be more proactive about building my career and marketing my work.

I'm also starting to put together our earthquake kit. I've put it off for far too long, but something like Katrina reminds you that disasters do happen, and you can't count on someone else to save you.

On a more uplifting note, Scott and I spend half of Monday building me an unbelievably bountiful stack of beautiful wooden painting supports. I think we made about 100 of them! And the best thing is, it was all free! We salvaged a ton of nice wood from a dumpster behind a cabinet shop. Any painters out there should check out the back sides of their local cabinet shop, because it's incredible. The one that we went to throws away a 20 yd. dumpster full of wood each week. I love being able to save beautiful wood from the landfill. I consider that as part of my artwork.

painting finished

This is the painting I did for Crafters United. I'll post the link when it's listed in their etsy shop. It's encaustic, oil, and paper on wood panel, and I think I'll price it at $75.00. 100% of the proceeds will go to the Red Cross.

crafter's united

I'm working on some things to donate to the "Crafters United" hurricane relief fundraising effort started by craftrevolution.com. They've raised over $7,5000.00 so far to be donated to the Red Cross. I'll post photos here when I'm finished.

Here are some other cool things from the Crafters United shop...
*heart earrings
*narrative tray table
*apple raspberry neck wrap
*if'n books address book (I have one and I love it!)
*let's make out
*trilobite pendant

reading

I have been reading this blog written by a guy who is holed up in an office building in New Orleans, trying to keep servers online.

There are photos and a live camera feed.